Akane 1/2 By: Eathan Michaud Disclaimer: I don't own the Ranma 1/2 characters. Rumiko Takahashi does. Besides, I don't think I'd wanna own 'em. Nope, not at all. Prologue: Ranma,Ryoga Akane, Ryoka, and Keidanko Write a Fanfic! Beginning notes: This story takes place after Ranma and Co. meet Ryoka, and before they meet Tenchi and Co.. You don't need to read the stories involving Keidanko to enjoy the story, just the intermissions. And by the way, this is NOT an alternate reality story, it's a fanfic fanfic. It was a typical Sunday morning in Nerima. In the Tendo Dojo, Kasumi was in the kitchen cooking, Akane was out for her jog, Nabiki was trying to get all the sleep she could, Ranma-chan, Keidanko-chan, Ryoga, and Genma were sparring (or should I say, Ranma-chan, Keidanko-chan, and Ryoga were beating the crap out of Genma for splashing them earlier. They started when at least Ryoga changed back so he could join in on many people's favorite past time, Genma Bashing.),Ryoka was sitting on the couch, trying not to get lost, and Soun and Hekaru were reading the paper. At Ucchan's, Ukyo and Konatsu were starting to open the restaurant, ready to rake in a nice profit on this beautiful Sunday. At the Nekohanten, the Amazons were doing the same. It was in a different way though, Mousse would proclaim him love to Shampoo, Shampoo would beat the crap out of him, and Cologne would grumble about kids these days. At the Kuno mansion, Kuno was sleeping, dreaming of his two loves and defeating the sorceror Saotome and the demon shapeshifter (AKA Keidanko), Kodachi was watering her plants, and training her Akane-Eating Plant, while laughing her insane laugh , and Principle Kuno was finishing shaving the mailman's hair, for the third time that week. Happosai didn't sleep. He was on a panty, sugar and, caffine high, bouncing aroung like crazy, and being chased by Taro. Anyhow, back at the ranch, er, Tendo Dojo, breakfast was being served, and the fights began. Everyone was seated at the table eating, while Akane and Ranma were fighting. Akane had innocently asked, "Kasumi? Would you like to go shopping with me later?" and before Kasumi could respond, or Keidanko could slap his hand over Ranma's mouth, Ranma stuck his foot in it, "Geesh, how much clothes could a kawaiikune girl like you need anyhow?" The comment was followed by a "Ranma no BAKA!" from Akane, and *Wham!* the mallet. The table was silent after that, except Soun, Nabiki, and Hekaru discussing the stocks, and Kasumi answering Akane's question with a, "Yes, I'd love to Akane-chan." Breakfast was soon over, and Akane and Kasumi left for the mall. After Ranma and Ryoga finished the dishes, Keidanko walked up to them. He asked them, "Hey, could you guys help me with something?" and Ranma responded, "Sure, what?" "I need to pick something up, and it's to much for me to handle without breaking it." and Ryoga responded, "Okay, let's go." and the three left for Circuit City, Nerima branch. The Nerima branch of Circuit City is much more different than any other. First, the floors, doors, walls, and ceiling were made of depleted titanium, much like Ryoga's umbrella. They thought this would protect the store.(They don't know the martial artists of Nerima well, do they? Shampoo can make a door through anything and the Bakusai Tenketsu would still turn it into rumble.) Second, the staff were all highly trained martial artists. (Nice idea, but it don't mean squatt again depresso-boy or the most confident person in Japan.) And finally, NONE of the staff were female. (Not sexism, good sense. Happosai'd never go anywhere near Circuit City, Nerima branch if there were no pretty ladies. No Happosai, no monster-form Taro destroying the store) Anyway, Ranma, Keidanko, and Ryoga arrive at Circuit City, Nerima branch. Keidanko walks up to a staff member and asks, "Hello, I'm Tendo Keidanko, do you have my purchase ready?" and the staff mamber responds, "Yes, we do. Please wait while we bring it up front." he leaves leaving the three to talk amongst themselves. Ryoga asks Ranma, "Ranma, where's your mom?" "I don't know, pops said she'd be back soon though." "Oh." then Ryoga turned to Keidanko and asked, "What are we carrying anyway?" "You'll see when we get home." and Keidanko ended the conversation when the staff member and some others came with two large boxes, two medium sized boxes, and a slightly larger than medium sized box. The staff member that they met first said, "Here you go. That'll be one hundred thousand yen." "Okay, here ya go." and Keidanko handed the man a large wad of bills. And he responded, "Thank you, we hope to have you shop here again." and he and the other staff members handed the boxes to Ranma, Ryoga, and Keidanko. Keidanko and Ranma each had a large box, while Ryoga took the others. They left Circuit City, Nerima branch and went back to the dojo. It was lunch time then, so they stopped by the Nekohanten for a quick bite to eat. Shampoo was about to glomp and Mousse was about to attack when Keidanko said, "If that stuff breaks, I won't hesitate to use the Hebi Fuko Namida on either of you." The threat worked, because neither of them did anything while they ate. After Ryoga and Keidanko paid for their food, they and Ranma left to continue their way to the dojo. At the dojo, Akane was cooking lunch for Ranma. She was certain Ranma would like the american food she was cooking. Who doesn't like french fries? While the fries varied in length (Doesn't really matter) she decided to add some wasabi to spice it up. Nutmeg would make it... interesting. (*cough* poison *cough*) She then put the fries into the wok and waited for them to finish. The fries were done, the same time Ranma, Ryoga, and Keidanko came home. The boys put the boxes down and collapsed on the couch. Akane called cheerfully, "Ranma!" Ranma suddenly paled. Whenever Akane was in a good mood, she's been cooking. He responded, "Yeah?" "I made you lunch." "Uh, gomen, I already ate." Akane's battle aura flared to life as she said, "Oh really?" "Yeah, We ate on the way home." "Oh, surely you must still be hungry." "Uh, not really, I might be after I'm done with helping Keidanko." "What does Keidanko need help in?" Keidanko answered that time, "I need to unpack these boxes." and Ryoga asked, "You gonna tell us what it is now?" "Yeah, it's a computer." "Uh, doesn't Nabiki have one?" "Yeah, but I don't feel like payin' each time I use it." "Oh." and Ranma, Ryoga, and Keidanko carried the boxes upstairs. Inside the guy's room, Ranma, Ryoga, and Keidanko unpacked the computer. As they are setting it up, Ryoka wanders in. She speaks, startled, "Keichan? What are you doing in the bathroom?" "Ya ain't in the bathroom Ryochan." "Oh, whatcha doin'?" Then Ranma answered, "We're settin' up Keidanko's computer." "Oh, can I help?" and the Ryoga answered, "Sure, I don't have a clue where the hell the wire for this, 'tower', goes. Just what is a tower?" Keidanko answered, "See that thing standing on its end, the thing that LOOKS like a tower?" "Yeah?" "THAT'S the tower." "Oh." and it continued like this for an hour and a half. When it came time for dinner, they ate upstairs, with Akane, watching Keidanko open a bunch of files and he showed them how to use the computer.A few days go by, and we find Ranma looking through the files, looking for the AOL start-up thingie (that's what Ranma calls it. And he missed the fact that it was on the desktop.) and he stumbled upon a strange Word Document called "Birth of a Dragon, End of an Era" and opened it. After reading it, Ranma concluded it was something about Slayers. And thus he called, "Keidanko! What is this?" and Keidanko came rushing in saying, in english, "I can't believe he found them! That american kid said noone could find 'em." and looked at the screen. He let go a sigh of relief and said, "That's my fanfic I'm working on." "Fanfic?" "Yeah, it's like extra episodes you write yourself for anime, tv shows, and video games. That's my fanfic for Slayers." "Do other people do this stuff?" "Yeah. There's a bunch of sites dedicated to fanfic, some entirely on one series. (like rakhal.com for Ranma 1/2 and tmffa.com for Tenchi Muyo. There may be more, but those are the only two I know of) There are all kinds of fanfic, like there is all kinds of anime, tv shows, and video games. There's Dark, that's about really depressing stuff. Ryoga could probably write a good Dark story. There's Comedy, that's lighter, and usually funny. There's Alterverse, where the sory is changed in such a way that it is hardly the same. There's Drama, that's more serious than a Comedy, but it can have some comedy in it. There's Lemon, that's more adult than anything. There's hardly a Lemon with a good plot. A WAFF is warm and fuzzy feeling. The complete opposite of a Dark, it's a feel good fic. There're Crossovers, a story that joins more than one subject. That's my favorite. And finally, there's Spam. Spam, like the luncheon meat, is completely silly. It often makes no sense. "What is "Birth of a Dragon, End of an Era?"" "That, is a Drama. Sometimes you can tell what a fic is by the title. Oh, I just thought of something. Go get Ryochan, Akane, and Ryoga." "Er, okay." Ranma leaves to get them while Keidanko opens Word and types a little. Ranma and the others return. Keidanko spoke up, "I just decided that we're gonna write a fanfic about my favorite show." Everyone groans, Keidanko grins and says, "And this is it." They look at the screen and it says: Akane 1/2 A fanfic about the life of a friend By: Tendo Keidanko, Tendo Akane, Saotome Ranma, Hibiki Ryoga, Hibiki Ryoka Everyone groans and Ranma speaks up, "You wanna do a story about my life!? Are you crazy?!" and Keidankoi replies, "Yes. Bwahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!" and everyone sweatdrops.Keidanko continues, "It's not just on your life it's an Alterverse where Akane is the one who gets beaten, cursed and engaged to several people." *WHAM!* Akane removes the mallet and says, "Baka! Why should we help you?" "'Cause ya ain't got nothin' else to do. We'll start tommorow." End Prologue Author's notes: I don't know why I wrote this. It just dawned on me one night. And just as Keidanko said, it's a warping of the Ranma 1/2 series. If there are any episodes you haven't seen, this story may ruin it for you. As alway's constructive criticism is welcome, and flames'll burn the midnight oil. And also as always, I could use proof-readers. Arigato and sayonara!