Contemplations.

Neon Genesis Evangelion and its characters are property of Gainax
and
are used without permission.


    Rei absent-mindedly brushed her hair from her face as
she looked out over the blue green sea. The sounds of the
rest of her class as they larked around meant very little to
her and as per usual she had ended up by herself. She spent a
brief moment wondering about the reason behind this field
trip but dismissed it as irrelevant. Neither of the Second
or Third children were here and the only reason she had to come
here was at Misato's insistence. The captain seemed to think
that it was necessary for her to keep her education on
track with school requirements. Rei did not care either way.
She had been told to come so she had come.
    However, now that she was here she did have to admit
that she found the smell of the sea, the cool wind and the
endless motion of the water to be soothing. She did not feel
the strange need that the others seem to be indulging in of
throwing sand at each other and splashing in the cold water.
Why the other school children felt like doing that she could
not even guess, but that was not her concern. Slowly she
turned away from looking at the waves and began to walk along
the beach. She headed for a set of black granite rocks that
strutted defiantly out into the ocean. It looked to be a bit
of a walk but it would help to pass the time.
    The walk took her slightly longer than expected and it
was not long before the sounds of her class mates was lost in
the crashing of the waves on the sandy beach. Rei looked at
the looming formation before her. She spotted a suitable
perch from which she could look out at the surrounding
area and slowly began to climb. It was a bit of an effort but
Rei chose with route with care. Finally, with a last mad scramble
she reached the little lip of rock from which she could look
freely around. She wiped her sandy hands on her school
uniform and balancing carefully looked out around her. The
scenery was simply stunning and Rei inhaled deeply the moistened
sea air. She felt strangely relaxed and free as she simply stood
with her eyes closed feeling the wind on her face. One of her
very rare small smiles lit her face and for the first time she
was almost glad that she had come.
    "Relaxing isn't it Ayanami?" a young voice suddenly said
behind her almost causing Rei to lose her balance. She
recovered and turned to face the speaker who had so
surprised her.
    The girl was slightly older than Rei and dressed in
causal attire. She was not part of the school trip and as far as
Rei could remember she had never seen this girl before.
    "Yes, it is," Rei replied.
    "Do you know how long it has been here like this?" the
girl asked gesturing around her.
    "No," Rei answered the odd question.
    "For well over two hundred thousand years," the girl
replied. "Long before Man had even evolved a language. It has
simple stood here - waiting. It was here long before Man was
civilised and will be here long after Man has evolved on. For
it, the whole of Man's history will be little more than a
tick on a clock. All the wars, the religions, conflicts and
love will be gone - with nothing remaining. It is a thought
that helps put things into perspective, don't you think?"
    "Why?" Rei asked.
    The girl shrugged, "what is the moment to the eternal.
And what is Man to the face of God."
    Rei did not answer, there seemed to be little point to this
discussion so she turned and looked back at the swelling of the
sea below.
    "Do you believe in God Ayanami?" the girl asked after a
moment.
    Rei took a moment to consider the question. What did
she believe in? She knew that the Angels were supposed to be
messengers of God but they were fighting the Angels. She had
heard that God was a power of love - but the Angels only
bought destruction and chaos. So what did that make God?
    "I don't know," Rei replied truthfully. "I don't know
what I believe in."
    "You could believe in yourself," the girl suggested.
    "Why?" Rei questioned the girl. "Why do I need to
believe in anything?"
    "Because if you do not believe in anything then why
fight? Why live? You do believe in something, the only
problem is that you just do not recognise what it is."
    "Oh," Rei said and took a moment to consider what the
girl had said. Why did she fight? She fought because HE told
her too. She went to school because HE expected her to. HE...
    "See," the girl said. "You do have something to believe
in."
    "Perhaps," Rei said thoughtfully.
    "Ayanami... Ayana..." the faint voice calling out was
distorted by the wind.
    "I think your teacher is after you," the girl said with
a nod back at the way Rei had come. "Perhaps you had better
be getting back."
    "Yes, I suppose I had," Rei replied and turned to start
the descent down.
    "Rei," the girl said just before Rei passed her. "Why
do you follow him so devotedly?"
    That caused Rei to pause - why? Why did she obey him so
completely? Why was HE so central to her life?
    "...nami..."
    "You had better be going Rei-chan," the girl said softly.
"Thanks for the little chat and think about what I have
said. You may find you have more than just one thing to believe
in. Go on now child."
    Rei nodded and started on her descent. She stopped and
a slight frown cross her face. Why? That last question still
needed an answer.
    "Why..." Her question halted in her mouth. The girl was
gone as if she had never been. Rei blinked. How could the
girl just have vanished? The only way down was the path Rei was
taking. It did not make sense. She...
    "Ayanami..."
    "Go Rei-chan," the soft voice spoke again and Rei obediently
nodded and returned to her descent. The question of why would
have to wait for another day.

**End of Contemplations